8 things you can do if you're alone this festive season

Whilst this time of year is generally focused on the positive holiday triggers that are all around us - the festive decorations, indulgent foods, endless present wrapping - filling us with feelings of warmth and nostalgia at the memory of past periods and excitement for the festivities to come, for some of us, those triggers may instead evoke very different memories, or feelings, and exacerbate loneliness.

For whatever reason, whether that be social isolation, travel restrictions, estranged families or the death of a loved one, the festive season can be an especially difficult time of year.

So to help, these 8 little tips can provide you comfort when you’re unable to spend the season with family.

1. Take a step back

Remember that Christmas is only 1 day out of 365 and just as you’ve found the strength to get through other difficult 24-hour periods throughout your life, you will with this one too. It’s often the way we think about an event that has the biggest impact on our feelings towards it, and the outcome we will have, so shift your mindset and try to focus your attention to look at the situation from a different perspective.

2. Appreciate where you are

Regardless of the fact you might be alone right now or finding yourself in a less than ideal state, focus on all the good things in your life, whether that’s having a roof over your head, good health, food on the table or friends to laugh with from a distance. Practice being grateful for what you have by consciously writing down at least three things to be thankful for right now, and encourage yourself to be in the present moment.

3. Master your mindset

If you’re currently overwhelmed by negative thoughts and wondering how you can feel grateful for anything whilst currently feeling unable to cope, remember that those anxious, worried or doubting thoughts are purely in our heads. You can allow yourself to feel lonely because you are physically alone or, instead, you can reframe your thoughts by recognising instantly when a negative one pops in your mind and replacing it with something more constructive.

4.Create your own tradition

Find a way to enjoy this time by yourself and rather than immediately jumping to view the negatives of being alone, set the intention of making your own little mini traditions instead. Buy yourself a gift online, cook your favourite meal, plan a movie marathon, begin reading a novel from your list or even sit down to start your own. Take the time to get creative and productive with a project you've been putting off, or simply prioritise finding enjoyment in whatever you do!

5. Do something productive and memorable

Consider starting the day by heading outside for a fresh morning run or walk, volunteering at a local homeless shelter or attending a church service. Find ways to avoid focusing on the fact you are alone this holiday and remember that it doesn’t mean you can’t still do something memorable or impactful.  

6. Plan ahead

Avoid being alone next year if you’ve decided that you don’t want to, or make a plan to take control of your health by visiting your doctor in the New Year if it’s social anxiety that is resulting in you being alone. Choose to take control of your health, and how you want to live your life. Whatever that may look like for you, make a conscious decision to change and take the first step towards action.

7. Volunteer

The easiest way to find more appreciation for your own life, whatever circumstance you’re currently in, is to volunteer and immerse yourself in the presence of others, connect with people from different walks of life and find fulfilment in bringing joy to people who are even less fortunate. Some ways to volunteer during the holidays include taking gifts to a children's hospital, doing the shopping for a neighbour who is housebound, visiting lonely residents in a care home or offering time at a local soup kitchen or homeless shelter.

8. Immerse yourself

Know that it’s ok to reconsider invitations that you may have previously turned down due to social anxiety, even if you feel like you are putting someone out. Consider setting up virtual celebrations or video phone calls with those that are distant from you and remember to reach out for support if you are finding being alone during the holidays particularly hard to cope with. Whether you are physically or emotionally isolated this festive season, know that there is always someone willing to listen and support you.

Many of our practitioners work during the festive period so please reach out to us to book a session hello@myndup.com.